Dad,
You’ve been gone a year and a half now. The grief and emptiness of your passing is just as fresh, just as raw, and just as painful as it was on that Sunday afternoon, November 11th, 2018. I miss your voice. I miss your crooked grin. I miss the twinkle that was always in your eyes. And I miss you calling out, “Hey, Sis” or “Love you, Sis” or “What are you doing, Sis?” While I didn’t like it when you called me “Sis” as a highschooler, it came to be a name that I treasured. I treasured it because it was your name for me. It was loving. It was heartfelt. It was special because you’re the only one that called me that. I miss you, Dad.
Peace and comfort come to me when I remember that you are at peace. You are at rest. You worked so hard, so relentlessly, so unselfishly your entire life. You were valued, respected, admired and appreciated for your hard work ethic; and you, in return, showed your appreciation to others for doing the same. Rest is not a word that was in your wheelhouse. You worked endlessly to better the lives of those in your life: Mom, Jason and me and our families, your siblings, the church, and your community. The most amazing part of your story is that you worked hard for others, taking little time to rest for yourself, and you did it all with such humility and integrity. For you, putting in the hard work wasn’t about the thank yous, the praise, or the accolades you would get for doing it. It was about you being the kind of man that always put others first. We need more people like you in this world, Dad. You were the same person in public as you were at home. And, when you would finally put your head to rest at night, you slept soundly and peacefully because you lived with no words left unsaid and no regrets.
While I would move heaven and earth to have you back, even for just five minutes to hug you, kiss you and say goodbye, I wouldn’t change the way in which God called you home. You were outside on a beautiful fall day, doing what you loved most- working in the yard. You used to always say, “ When it’s my time to go, I hope I’m out in the yard working on a beautiful day, and the good Lord takes me.” Well, you got it your way, Dad. And if anyone deserves it, you certainly did. You left this world, just as you lived in it. And while I hurt so deeply and don’t understand God’s timing, I do trust Him and know He took you to be with Him exactly when you were meant to go. I trust that He took you to spare you any suffering or pain they may have come in later years with age. You are the most righteous person I know, and in the book of Isaiah it says, “The righteous perish, and no one takes it to heart; the devout are taken away, and no one understands that the righteous are taken away to be spared from evil. Those who walk uprightly enter into peace; they find rest as they lie in death.” (Isaiah 57:1-2)
You lived a full life, Dad. You worked hard your entire life. You loved without limits. You inspired so many to be better, to do better. So even though you weren’t someone that took much time to rest, your hard work did help others relax and feel refreshed. And, I find solace as I know that you are now at rest in the arms of Jesus. I will spend the rest of my life trying to be half the person you were, and I look forward to seeing you again in His kingdom.
Love you, Sis
“Go rest high on that mountain
Son, your work on Earth is done.
Go to heaven a-shoutin'
Love for the Father and the Son.”- Vince Gill